Freedom! Freedom!!

It all started with snow.... I had class at MSUM yesterday and it was snowing. A lot! And as I drove, beneath the terror of not being able to see out my frosted windows and snow covered vehicle, I felt a move in my heart. Imagine with me a hand. A hand holding something that is obviously of great importance since the knuckles are white and the fingers are digging into the palm for dear life. This is a picture of me and my desire for that ever elusive relationship as I like to call it. Yesterday as I was driving I felt this hand start to open up and release what it has been holding for years. And as I saw it happen, I felt the tension melt away and the fingers uncramp as they let go of the treasure. Do you know that feeling when you take cold medication and you can start to feel it work its magic in your sinuses and chest? That is EXACTLY what this felt like. As I opened my hand and released that desire to God's far more capable hands, I felt that relief flood over me. For the first time in so many years, I breathed in fresh air without the stench of this slightly stagnant treasure clogging my nasal passages. I truly feel free today and there is so much joy and just plain old happiness in that!! Truly, I cannot explain it beyond that - but rejoice with me as I walk confidently today knowing that my Lover-God is the lover I have searched for and found. He gives me my wine and my bread. He speaks tenderly to me. He sustains me and cares for me. It is HE who will provide in His time, with His resources... Praise the Lord!!