It's been awhile and what a scary place to leave folks hanging. So, of late, things are moving and shifting and changing, much is questioned and less is realized. I'm doing better, but there is still a great tendency towards running and just wanting to be left alone. I'm sure I'll like people again one day :) Seriously though, the desire to just push people out of my life is indeed a felt struggle right now. I think I'm trying to be invisible again and relieve people from what I feel is their duty to love me and support me. Like I'm saying, "I know, I'm really difficult, you don't have to stay. I want you to live a good life, let me go." So what does that say? Not sure...
On a wholly unrelated topic, I have become an avid fan of the show Prison Break. Whoa! That's all I gotta say (PB fans, you know what I'm saying wink wink). Great show, but I am also realizing that there are a lot of words connected to being a fan of anything. Fan-atic. Fan-tastic. Fan-tasize. Fan-fare.... I could go on, but I think we can see the emotional roller coaster being a fan of anything can be. Right now, I just finished the last season and am eagerly awaiting the next along with a large group of my closest friends. The hilarious thing is a month ago I got annoyed when people would talk about this show and now I have turned into them... I won't get into it, but know I am fully aware of my hypocrisy. But my question is this - at what point does healthy enjoyment cross over to obsession? I don't have an answer for that, I don't THINK I'm at that point but it's good food for thought. So that's the update for now.
6 years ago
No comments:
Post a Comment